STAM
TORAH
PARSHAS
MISHPATIM/SHEKLAIM 5777
“THE BETTER HALF”
A woman and her husband interrupted their
vacation to go to the dentist. The man walked into the office and announced, "Look
doc, I need you to extract a tooth, but I’m in a big rush, so I have no time to
wait for Novocain. Just get the tooth out as quickly as possible, and we'll be
on our way."
The dentist was impressed. "You're
certainly a courageous man," he said. "Which tooth is it?" The
man turned to his wife, "Show him your tooth, dear."
Contrast:
Rabbi Aryeh Levine zt’l, “the tzaddik of
Jerusalem”, once walked into the doctor’s office with his wife and said,
“Doctor, my wife’s foot is hurting us!”
In regards to the Temple Service
·
Each Jew was obligated to contribute a half-shekel in order to
take a consensus of the nation[1].
·
The special meal-offering was brought, “half it in the morning
and half in the afternoon.[2]”
·
The dimensions of the Holy Ark that rested in the Holy of
Holies were, “two and a half cubits its length; a cubit and a half its width;
and a cubit and a half its height… a cover of pure gold, two and a half cubits
its length; and a cubit and a half its width…[3]”
What
is the significance of ‘halves’ in regards to the Divine Service?
At the conclusion of parshas Mishpatim, the
Torah records the events that occurred at the time of the giving of the Torah
at Sinai[4]:
“Moshe came and told the people all the
words of G-d and all the ordinances, and the entire people responded with one
voice and they said, ‘All the words that G-d has spoken, we will do… He sent
the youths of the Children of Israel and they brought up elevation-offerings,
and they slaughtered bulls… Moshe took half the blood and placed it in basins,
and half the blood he threw on the altar. He took the Book of the Covenant and
read it win earshot of the people, and they said, ‘”Everything that G-d has
spoken we will do and we will hear (na’aseh v’nishma)’.”
What changed in the nation’s response that,
at first, they responded that they would do everything G-d commanded,
whereas after Moshe divided the blood they responded with the legendary words,
‘We will do and we will hear’?
The Be’er Moshe explains that G-d created
the world based on a system of ‘provider-recipient’. No one is self-sufficient,
and we all need each other in different ways.[5]
Everything in the world is nourished and sustained based on this system.
The verse in Bereishis states[6]:
“Male and female He created them.” The male represents the provider of the raw materials,
while the female represents accepting those materials and nurturing them,
bringing them to their full potential. Only together do they compose the
complete entity that G-d intended, “He created them male and female. He blessed
them and called their name – Adam on the day they were created.[7]”
The first man and woman, as a synergistic union, were called ‘Adam’, and
represented composite perfection. In that sense, the primordial couple is the
prototype for all future unions.
The gemara states that a cow wishes to
express its milk to its calf even more than the calf wishes to nurse from its
mother. This is true in regards to all such relationships. The ‘provider’
requires and benefits from the ‘receiver’ even more than the receiver requires
the provider. The giver-provider connection is inextricable and both draw
strength and inspiration from their respective roles. The receiver is granted
new materials or knowledge that he requires, and the provider is granted a
sense of innate purpose and satisfaction through giving and helping another.
If we desire that G-d shower us with
blessing and goodness, we have to initiate that process by assisting others.
In this sense, every individual must view
himself as a half. The novelty is that not only should the receiver see himself
as deficient without his provider, but the provider himself must view himself
as deficient without the receiver. It is this repeated cycle that unites us and
creates a sense of closeness and bonding.
The Mishkan was a perennial microcosmic
representation of the Revelation of Sinai[8].
At Sinai, the nation achieved an uncanny level of complete unification, which
was a prerequisite for their receiving the Torah. In order to remind them of
the need to always feel that sense of fraternity there were many halves in the
measurements of the Mishkan. Those halves served as a reminder that no one is
complete when he stands alone.
When Moshe divided the blood, he was
symbolizing this idea. The two halves of the blood together represented
completion. The nation’s declaration “we will do” represents this world, the
world of action and physical accomplishment. The declaration “we will hear” on
the other hand, represents the higher realm, the world of intellect and wisdom
in which the voice of reason, based on the Word and Will of G-d, dominate.
Originally the nation pledged to do all the
mitzvos by fulfilling everything demanded of them. After all, the Torah was
being given to a physical world of action. But when Moshe divided the blood
before them, it symbolized that there is a need for another component in their
acceptance – a level of depth and understanding. It isn’t enough to act in
isolation, or even to perform actions with others. There is a need for
understanding and connection – not only physically, but moreover on a spiritual
level. Thus, the next time they added that they would do and they would
hear.
This idea is applicable to many facets of
life. But it is perhaps no more true than in marriage – the ultimate union[9].
Megillas Esther relates that when Queen
Esther risked her life and approached King Achashveirosh unlawfully, it was a
moment of incredible peril. Essentially, the future of the entire Klal Yisroel
was in limbo. “When the King noticed Queen Esther standing in the court, she won
his favor. The King extended to Esther the gold scepter that was in his hand,
and Esther approached and touched the tip of his scepter.[10]”
The words “in his hand” seem to be
extraneous. Where else would the scepter be?
Rabbi Shimshon of Antropoli zt’l explained
that a scepter has two parts. The top of the scepter represents the authority
and august majesty of the king, and therefore always remains in the hand of the
king. The bottom of the scepter was used as the extension of the king’s hand,
to symbolize whether the king was pleased with the person’s presence or not.
When Achashveirosh saw Esther standing
before him, he was so taken by her charisma, sincerity, and persona that he did
something unthinkable. He turned the scepter around so that the top portion
which always remained in his hand was facing Esther, as if to say that she was
worthy of all his power and prestige. In her extreme humility and wisdom Esther
walked up to the king and touched the bottom of the scepter (which was now
facing him), symbolizing that she deferred to his authority and majesty.
This exchange between Esther and
Achashveirosh represents an ideal marriage. A husband must be ready to forgo
his honor to his wife, while she defers it back to him, both with unyielding
love and admiration for the other.
The Sages explain that every time the word
“hamelech (the king)” appears in the megillah it is an allusion to G-d,
the King of Kings. The King represents G-d while the Queen represents us who
receive G-d’s blessing and goodness.
Rabbi Hirsch explains that when Moshe
divided the blood and placed half on the altar and half in the basin, he was
symbolizing that there is a deep relationship between us and G-d, as it were. “The
one half of the blood had already been thrown on the Altar and now Moshe threw
the other half towards the nation. This would express the idea, that every drop
of blood, every ounce of our forces, that we give up to carry out G-d’s Will on
earth, is given back to us in full measure that we give it to G-d. We receive
it back from G-d, and we only really have true possession of ourselves if we
offer ourselves to G-d.”
A few years ago, I read about a new custom
that has gained a following in the distorted world of extreme feministic
Judaism. They decided that the noise of groggers being spun at the mention of
the name of Haman was obnoxious and disturbing (basically it’s too ‘manly’). Therefore,
they created flags that have a depiction of Esther on one side and Vashti on
the other side[11],
and little bells on the bottom. Whenever the names of Vashti or Esther are
read, they wave the flags gently.
Such distortion of holy customs emanates
from a lack of understanding and appreciation for the Torah’s viewpoint of the
woman’s role. In a marriage built on love and trust, such feelings do not arise
because the husband ‘turns the scepter’ towards his wife, while she directs it
back to him. It is only when a marriage is not built on mutual respect and love,
that feelings of inferiority and inadequacy arise.
Kav Hayashar quotes the Zohar which relates
the following: “Rabbi Chiya and Rabbi Abba were guests in someone’s home one
evening. At midnight, they arose to study Torah. The daughter of their host got
up and lit a torch so that they could study Torah. When Rabbi Abba saw her actions
he began and he said: (The verse in Mishley (6:23) states -) “For a mitzvah is
a candle and Torah is light.” The woman is commanded to light the Shabbos
candles, and not the man. The reason is the woman corresponds to the Divine
Presence. “Torah is light”, meaning, the Torah that her husband studies, for a
man is commanded about the study of Torah. That gives tremendous light like the
mitzvah of Shabbos candles. What emerges is that both of them create the light
of Torah and Shabbos.”
In a proper home the spiritual light is
created by the joint efforts of both the husband and wife.
Parshas Shekalim always marks the imminent
commencement of the month of Adar[12].
The gemara[13]
states, “When Adar arrives we increase joy.” There is much discussion about exactly
what this means and how one increases joy. But one thing is for certain:
Whenever we are able to help another person in any way it fills us with an
indescribable feeling of contentment and joy.
The reading of the Shekalim reminds us that
we all need each other, not only on a physical level, but also (and perhaps
even more so) on a spiritual/psychological level. It is our ability to feel
worthy and needed that gives us a sense of purpose and mission[14].
When we appreciate each other, we realize
why, as a nation, we are united. The joy that emanates from that awareness is
why we were able to reaccept the Torah on Purim and why the joy of Purim is
unparalleled.
“Moshe took half the blood”
“When Adar arrives, we increase joy”
Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW
Rabbi, Kehillat New Hempstead
Rebbe/Guidance Counselor – ASHAR
Principal – Ohr Naftoli- New Windsor
[1] This is
discussed in the special reading for Parshas Shekalim. Shemos 30: 11-16
[2] Vayikra 6:12 ; This meal offering was offered
by every Kohen once in his lifetime , the first time he performed the Temple Service
[3] Shemos
25:10-22
[4] Shemos
24:1-11; There is a dispute among the commentaries exactly when this account
transpired. According to Rashi it occurred prior to the giving of the Torah.
Ramban, Ibn Ezra, and Rashbam however opine that it occurred after the giving
of the Torah.
[5] This is all
the more true in regards to our relation with G-d as we are completely reliant
on His beneficence.
[6] Bereishis
1:27
[7] Bereishis
5:2
[8] See Ramban
(Parshas Terumah)
[9] I heard the
following thought from Rabbi Avrohom Chaim Feuer shlita, Kehillas Bais Avrohom
(Monsey NY
[10] Esther 5:2
[11] They have
decided that Vashti is an underrated heroine because she refused her husband’s
demand that she appear in public completely immodestly. Apparently, in their
ineptitude, they neglect the fact that the gemara says that she was an
incredibly wicked and immoral woman, and that she had every intention to adhere
to his request, until she developed some grotesque physical blemishes.
[12] Parshas
Shekalim is read the Shabbos prior to Rosh Chodesh Adar
[13] Ta’anis 29a
[14] When
elderly or disabled people feel that they can no longer be of benefit to others
and are merely a burden, it can be overwhelmingly disheartening for them. When
such a person asks to help, perhaps our best response should not be “it’s okay”
because we don’t want to burden them. By allowing them to help out we may just
be giving them a spark of life.