Thursday, January 24, 2019



One of the greatest English seforim I have read in the last few years was Mind Over Man, a collection of discourses from Rav Yechiel Perr, Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Derech Eisan in Far Rockaway, NY. The book is full of poignant and candid insights into human nature and contains timeless lessons for growth in contemporary society.
Rav Perr discusses the need for a person to question his motivations, even when doing positive actions. If a positive action is performed with negative intent, it can have a negative effect.
To demonstrate this point, he relates the following story:
“One time when I was a youngster in yeshiva, a fight broke out. It escalated to such a point that the cook quit and walked out close to Shabbos. We were a bunch of teenage boys in a dormitory, with no cooked meals and only hours before Kabbolas Shabbos. But we had a kitchen and a pantry full of raw materials, so three other boys and I decided to cook for Shabbos. You can imagine the scene – four of us sweating in the kitchen, with the other boys sitting around, joking and giving sage cooking advice. The food actually came out very good; until this day I’m proud of it.
“At one point, the Rosh Yeshiva came in to see how we were doing. I complained that everyone was issuing opinions and jokes without bothering to help. He responded with a great vort, although I doubt he remembers it. He said: If you can’t do it right, just walk out and don’t do it at all!
“It took me a long time to appreciate his words. Obviously, sometimes action must be taken, in cases of pikuach nefesh[2] or the like. But back in that hot kitchen decades ago, what would have happened if only three boys did the cooking? Maybe there wouldn’t have been kugel or chicken, or the soup would have come out wrong. But no one would have starved. In some situations, doing nothing is better than doing a mitzvah incorrectly. Although you are accomplishing a great thing, providing Shabbos for the public, there is a poisonous edge to your actions: resentment, negativity self-righteousness. These aspects of your actions impact on you, dragging you down. You are better off not doing it at all.
“Often people volunteer, but cannot handle that others are abandoning them to do it by themselves. If so, do not volunteer. If you tear your heart out, does it matter that it was full of kindness and empathy? Do it right with simcha and a positive outlook, or not at all. By stewing in your cynicism and bitterness, you lose all that you stood to gain from your generosity.”
Rav Perr continues that it is vital for a person to know his limits. Often people take on too much and it affects them personally or their family life. When one overextends himself, the negative impact it has outweighs the good he is accomplishing. With time he loses his desire to accomplish for others.
He notes that this is demonstrated in Yisro’s message to Moshe Rabbeinu. When Yisro saw throngs of people line up to pose their halachic inquires to Moshe, he declared, “navol tibol[3], you are wearing yourself out.  
The truth is that we have abilities beyond what we realize. A person gets married and has much greater responsibilities than when he was single. Then he has a child and his responsibilities increase exponentially. As his family grows, and life becomes busier, he has to shoulder much more than he thought possible. If responsibility has been thrust upon him he has no choice but to embrace it. If G-d sent it his way, that means he has the means to meet that challenge.
However, a person must be honest with himself to know when he needs to step back and ease up from what he is volunteering for.

This idea poses a very delicate challenge, because while it’s true that we don’t want to damage ourselves by taking on too much, we also have to make sure we aren’t ignoring opportunities.
The Zohar[4] relates that Avrohom Avinu understood that it was necessary for him to purchase Mearas Hamachpeilah from Ephron: “If Ephron had seen in the cave what Avrohom saw in it, he never would have sold it to him. Surely then he didn’t see anything, because the light of something is only revealed to its owner. Therefore, to Avrohom was revealed (a spiritual light), but not to Ephron.”
The Tzeidah Laderech utilizes this idea to explain why Yisro was the one who suggested the hierarchy system of judges which was implemented for the entire nation. Moshe himself would never have suggested that there be such a system with the hardest questions being brought to him, because of his extreme humility. For anyone in the nation to have suggested that it was too much for Moshe to answer everything himself was disrespectful to Moshe. Yisro therefore realized that he was the only one who could appropriately offer the suggestion.
Just as Avrohom realized it was his mission to purchase the cave, so did Yisro realize that it was incumbent upon him to suggest a revamping of the system. “The light of something is only revealed to its owner.”
Yisro rose to the occasion. Not only was his suggestion accepted, it is recorded in the Torah for posterity.
It is a stark reminder that when an opportunity arises when we recognize that we can make a difference and that we are in a position to accomplish, we have to take advantage of the moment.

The challenge is finding the delicate balance between knowing our calling and not burning ourselves out. It cannot be coincidental that these two diverse ideas appear together. On the one hand, the Torah records that Moshe had to hand over some of the reigns so that he and the nation did not become weary and overburdened. At the same time, Yisro recognized that he was the one who had to step into the limelight and offer advice. This despite the fact that it must have been uncomfortable for him to do so, after having arrived on the scene as a stranger not much earlier.  

The three days prior to Shavuos are called “shloshes yimei hagbalah – the three days of boundaries”. Before Kabbolas HaTorah, Hashem instructed Moshe three times to warn the nation not to traverse the boundaries set before them at the foot of Har Sinai. They were repeatedly warned that if they would so much as touch the mountain, they would instantly die.
Regarding spiritual growth, one cannot ‘rush up the mountain’. If we try to take on too much too quickly it can destroy us. On the other hand, we must make sure we are standing at the foot of the mountain poised to accept what we can.
Like everything else in life, finding that perfect balance is vital and yet challenging. One must know his limits, and yet ensure that he isn’t selling himself short.    

“You will wear out – also you and also this nation that is with you”
“The light of something is only revealed to its owner”

Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW
Rebbe/Guidance Counselor – Heichal HaTorah
Principal – Ohr Naftoli- New Windsor

[1] The following is the lecture I delivered at Kehillat New Hempstead, Parshas Yisro 5778
[2] Life in danger
[3] Shemos 18:18
[4] Bereishis 127:1-2

Thursday, January 17, 2019



One of the goals of the Nazis was to break the Jewish spirit and to destroy all semblances of dignity.
Dignity in response to attempted acts of physical and spiritual degradation was dramatically demonstrated in Lublin towards the end of 1939. The German commander, Glovoznik, had forcibly assembled the Jews in an empty field on the outskirts of the city and ordered them in jest to sing a Hassidic melody. Hesitantly, someone began the traditional melody “Lomir zich iberbeten, Avinu Shebashomayim - Let us become reconciled, Our Father in Heaven”.
The song, however, did not arouse much enthusiasm among the frightened masses. Immediately, Glovoznik ordered his hooligans to attack the Jews since they refused to comply with his instructions.
As the angry outburst began, an anonymous voice broke through the turmoil with a powerful and piercing cry, a distortion of the original words, “Mir velen sei iberleben, Avinu Shebashomayim - We will outlive them, O Father in Heaven!”
Instantly, the song took hold among the masses, until the people literally broke into a feverish dance. The assembled were swept up by the entrancing melody full of dveikus, which had now been infused with new content of faith and trust.
The intended derision was turned into a disaster for the bewildered Nazis, forcing Glovoznik to order a halt to the paradoxical spectacle.[2]

The Shabbos when parshas Beshalach is read, is called Shabbos Shirah. It has the distinction of being the only Shabbos of the year that merits a special title based on the weekly Torah reading.[3]
Although parshas Beshalach contains the Shiras Hayam, the magnificent song the nation sang on the banks of the Yam Suf after it miraculously split, it would seem that there is a deeper connection to the concept of shira/song in the parsha. More than half the events detailed in the parsha transpire after the shira concluded – including the sweetening of the bitter waters, the beginning of the manna falling daily, and the epic battle against Amalek.  
The Chiddushei Harim explains that the parsha contains the nation’s first experience observing Shabbos. They were instructed to gather a double portion of manna on Friday and to perform all preparations of the manna for Shabbos beforehand.
Shabbos is inherently a day of song, as the psalm of the day states: “A psalm; a song for the day of Shabbos: It is good to thank G-d and to sing to His Supreme Name.[4]
The Chiddushei Harim suggests that that is also an important component in why the Shabbos when this parsha is read has the distinction of being called “Shabbos Shirah”.

The parsha that contains the shirah and details about the ‘day of shirah’, must contain the key/prerequisite for shirah. How does one achieve a feeling of euphoric joy that prompts a deep shirah to burst forth from his lips?
Immediately after the nation emerged from the sea amidst incredible unprecedented miracles, they stood facing a vast ominous desert without provisions for basic survival. They were keenly aware of the fact that they had just been saved from an enemy that wanted to avenge their honor and retrieve their money and slaves. They had literally been saved from the throes of death and humiliation. At that point, millions of people stood unprotected in a forbidden, inhospitable land with their children, the elderly, and everything they owned. It must have been utterly frightening. Despite the miracles they had just experienced, how could they have sung in joyous unity at that moment?   
The answer to those questions also answers how anyone can one sing shirah in a world of uncertainty and vulnerability? How can one ever reach a state of blissful ebullience to sing shirah with conviction?
The final words written in the Torah before it begins the shirah are: “And they had faith in Hashem and in Moshe, His servant.”[5] The key to their ability to sing despite their predicament was their unwavering and complete faith.

At the end of each parsha, many chumashim have printed how many verses were in the parsha. Then, it will add a word which has some connection to the main theme of the parsha which has the numerical value of the amount of pesukim in the parsha as a mnemonic device to remember how many pesukim there are.
Parshas Beshalach contains 116 pesukim. The mnemonic word is “yad emunah - hand of faith”. The theme that traverses the parsha is that of faith.
The conclusion of the parsha records the story of the battle against Amalek. Rashi[6] explains that Amalek attacks whenever there is a weakening of faith. When the nation asked, “Is Hashem in our midst, or not?”[7] that was the precipitating factor which allowed Amalek to instigate a malicious, unprovoked attack. 

The Torah’s detailing of the falling of the manna also contains a potent lesson about faith.
Rav Samson Rafael Hirsch explains that the Torah relates that the nation complained about the lack of food on the fifteenth of the second month. The date is significant – it was exactly one month after the exodus occurred. That demonstrated that this was the next significant step the nation had to undertake following the exodus. They had been saved from slavery, but now came the great challenge of maintaining and preserving their redemption.
Rav Hirsch notes that the fear and angst of making a living can be overwhelming. If one feels that the burden of supporting his family and being the breadwinner falls on his shoulders alone, it is too much to bear. In such a state of inevitable anxiety, he surely will be unable to properly observe the Torah and grow in his commitments to serving G-d with peace of mind.[8] In his words, “Real or supposed hunger, and danger of hunger, makes all principles shaky, silences all better resolutions.”
The only solution is to build one’s faith. When one knows with certitude that as long as he has done his part and has made a proper effort to provide for his family, G-d is in full control and will care for his needs, then he can feel a sense of inner peace.
This is the vital message reinforced with our observance of Shabbos. When we desist from pursuing our personal interests on Shabbos and remind ourselves that G-d created the world, we ingrain within ourselves that He cares for every facet of our lives and cares for our needs.
It was no accident that G-d led the nation into the desert and allowed them to feel the anxiety of not knowing how they were going to provide for their families. In that moment of despair, G-d brought them the manna to teach them that such is the way of livelihood – It is G-d Who provides.[9]
Rav Hirsch adds, “On Pesach they built their homes for G-d; on Shabbos they ‘kept’ their homes for him.”  Shabbos is a day of song because it is a day when we strengthen our faith. The greater one’s faith, the more he will be able to live a life of song for the blessings and goodness he has been blessed with, instead of focusing on the things he lacks.

The gemara[10] notes that planting is alluded to in a verse[11] which speaks of faith. The gemara explains that the farmer “believes in the Living One of the Worlds and plants.” Tosafos[12] explains that for one to plant he must, “believe in the Living One of the worlds and plant”.
The process of planting entails that one takes a seed and place it in the ground and allow it to rot. How can one allow that to happen? Because he is confident of the process of nature, created by the Living One of the worlds. The rotted seed will then take root and begin to produce a mighty tree, which will eventually bear fruit that contains seeds that can produce endless amounts of trees.
Tu B‘Shvat is a celebration of the wonders of the ‘miraculous natural process’ of planting and growth. “Sing to Hashem a new song; sing to Hashem the entire land.”[13] The natural world is a manifestation of the wonders of G-d though we often forget that truth.
The more one is cognizant of the hand of G-d, the greater is his faith. The greater his faith the more he will live a life of endless song, even for the mundane, which will longer be mundane in his eyes.
It is an expression of heartfelt joy for all the blessings of life.

“He believes in the Living One of the Worlds”
“I will sing to Hashem for He greater than the great”

 Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW
Rebbe/Guidance Counselor – Heichal HaTorah
Principal – Ohr Naftoli- New Windsor

[1] The following is the lecture I delivered at Kehillat New Hempstead, Parshas Beshalach 5778
[2] Moshe Prager, “The Hassidic Movement During the Holocaust”
[3] The Shabbos when Bereishis is read often called Shabbos Bereishis, but that seems to be more connected with the fact that it is the beginning of the yearly cycle of Torah reading, more than the actual parsha. There are also a few other Shabbosos which merit special names based on an added laining, or a unique haftorah read that Shabbos.
[4] Tehillim 92:1-2
[5] Shemos 14:31
[6] Quoting Medrash Tanchuma
[7] Shemos 17:7
[8] A friend once quipped that we should not refer to making a living as the “ol haparnasa – the yoke of livelihood” but as “pachad haparnasah – the terror of livelihood”.
[9] I was very inspired when a fellow in my shul related that every month, when he receives his paycheck, he holds it up and thanks G-d for providing him with the means to support his family.
[10] Shabbos 31a
[11] Yeshaya 33:6 – “And the faith of your times shall be a strength of salvation, wisdom and knowledge; the fear of G-d is his treasure.” The gemara (ibid) expounds that the verse is alluding to the six orders of Mishnayos, each word referring to a different order.
[12] Ibid, quoting Yerushalmi
[13] Tehillim 96:2

Thursday, January 10, 2019



Mark Twain famously quipped that “denial aint just a river in Egypt”.
Pharaoh was in denial about his humanity, fancying himself to be a deity. To cover up for the fact that he had human needs, he clandestinely came down to the Nile every morning to imbue the waters with his personal unique ungodly “contribution”. The little-known fact is that during that time, he also secretly met with his therapist, Dr. Ingrid Hyssop[2].
One morning, during one of those secret sessions, Dr. Hyssop asked Pharaoh why he appeared so dispirited and agitated. Pharaoh replied that he was suffering from acute anxiety. He explained that now that the Jews had been duped into becoming slaves and were being subjected to extreme servility and backbreaking labor, he was afraid of a revolution. What could he do to ensure that the millions of slaves don’t mount a coup, and destroy his country?  
Dr. Hyssop replied by explaining to Pharaoh the hierarchy of Dr. Abraham Maslow[3]. Maslow posits that if one’s ‘bottom’ layer basic needs – including security, shelter, and food, aren’t being met, it is impossible to have his ‘higher level needs’ such as emotional connection and love, met. The highest level of all is self-actualization.
Dr. Hyssop suggested that as long as Pharaoh ensured that the nation was so beaten and exhausted and couldn’t take care of their basic needs, they would be unable to bond together to even discuss revolution and rebellion. As long as their sole focus was on survival, they would never have the energy or wherewithal to plan for a different life for themselves.
Pharaoh was greatly encouraged by Dr. Hyssop’s advice and used it as his guide in dealing with the Jewish Problem.

When Moshe appeared before Pharaoh and began speaking about the exodus and the concept of revolution, Pharaoh’s harsh response was that the Jews were lazy and that is why they were entertaining thoughts of redemption and exodus. Mesillas Yesharim explains that Pharaoh’s nefarious solution was תכבד העבודה, the workload should be increased[4]. In this way, he would ensure that the hapless slaves not have the ability to plan, or even dream, about improving their abysmal situation.
This was apparent at the beginning of Parshas Vaera, where the Torah says the nation couldn’t even hearken to the words of Moshe for a greater future, because of “shortness of breath and harshness of the servitude.”
The Medrash says that Pharaoh also decreed that men do women’s work and women do men’s work. From an economic vantage point, that is the worst way to ensure production.
However, Pharaoh’s intent was more focused on ensuring that his workers never have hope for change then about getting anything done.
My father often notes that when women watch their children, they say they are watching their children. But when men watch their children, they often say that they are babysitting. My father argues that it’s not babysitting to watch your own children.
I have often told my father that I disagree. When fathers try to diaper their children, or can’t figure out how to make a bottle (which may entail unscrewing the top and pouring milk in…) you see that they are babysitting. It’s just not their forte.[5] 

Every revolution in history, was the result of many secret meetings and planning by revolutionaries who dreamed, and were courageous to follow through with their dreams, to foster and create change. That’s what happened at the time of the American Revolution when the colonists met secretly under the noses of the British, it’s what happened at the time of the French Revolution, and at the time of the Russian Revolution. It’s what occurred at the time of the revolution when the State of Israel was declared in 1948. The Lechi and Irgun fought the British and relentlessly, and pursued their dream of independence, until it occurred.  It’s also what occurred during the Equality Movement in the 50s, such as with the march of Martin Luther King Jr.
Revolution and change are predicated on hope, and the ability to convene to pursue those goals. But when those wishing for change are so overwhelmed by servitude and oppression, change cannot occur.
The reason understanding Pharaoh’s tactic is so significant is that this is not ancient history.  This is in many ways a contemporary challenge we still face. Being blessed to live in a democracy affords us the ability to accomplish great things. However, we also tend to get lost in the bustle and rapidity of our lives which detract us from pursing our true goals, and from aspiring to be who/what we truly want to be.
My rebbe, Rabbi Berel Wein, often speaks about this challenge, noting that we are so caught up in carpools, deadlines, and other daily pressures that we can hardly focus on our ideals and aspirations.
That problem has been compounded in recent years with our enmeshment with technology and our complete obsession with social media. It dominates our lives, and we hardly come up for air to breathe in reality, because we are so lost in the fantasy world that technology provides.
Almost any time that people are bored in waiting rooms, airports, or on line[6] while shopping, they immediately take out their cell phones. Part of the reason for doing so, is whenever we are in somewhat unfamiliar surroundings, we begin to feel uncomfortable. To resolve that discomfort which we want to avoid, we take out our phones, and immediately connect with the familiar world of our personal social media, containing our own pictures, friends, and likes.
The problem is that some of our greatest innovations and ideas happen when we feel bored, anxious, or uncomfortable. It’s often those feelings that propels us out of our complacency. If we never feeling boredom or discomfort, it is robbing us of that integral impetus for growth, causing us to settle for mediocrity at best. 
The July 3, 2014 issue of The Atlantic contained an article entitled “People Prefer Electric Shocks to Being Alone with Their Thoughts.” The article cites a study, in which individuals were asked to spend a few minutes alone in a room. Before entering they gave their phones and any other potential distractors to someone outside. The only thing in the room was a button which, when pushed, administrated a painful electric shock to the one who pushed the button.
Forty percent of the women, and a far higher percentage of men gave themselves an electric shock while they were sitting in the room. They were so uncomfortable being alone with themselves, that they rather shocked themselves than be alone with their thoughts.

Part of the greatness of Shabbos is that it grants us the ability to rediscover the truth of our world and of ourselves. It is a day when we connect with everything near and dear to us. But, above all, we must utilize the day to think about whether we are being true to ourselves and developing our connection with Hashem.
The word Shabbos literally means a stopping. On Shabbos we desist from the daily bustle of our lives, so that we can reflect inwards, focus on our priorities, and what really matters most to us in life.
Exile means being stuck in place; redemption means freedom to grow and accomplish. Dovid Hamelech declared, “From the narrow straits I called to G-d; G-d answered me with widening (relief).[7]” When we are distressed, we feel constricted by whatever is causing our distress - health issues, lack of finances, etc. When we are granted relief, it is analogous to a widening of the mental/psychological constriction that we felt before.
The word ‘Mitzrayim’ literally means boundaries. In the Egyptian exile we were spiritually, emotionally, and psychologically trapped in the morass of servitude. The redemption granted us the ability to burst forth from the shackles of slavery to become holistic, free people.
In that sense, Shabbos Kodesh is a day of redemption. On Pesach we were freed on a grand national level. Each Shabbos we have the ability to ensure that we remain free, and not get lost in the vagaries of exile.
We should use the holy day well!

“Let the workload become heavier”
“He answered me with widening (relief), G-d.”

 Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW
Rebbe/Guidance Counselor – Heichal HaTorah
Principal – Ohr Naftoli- New Windsor

[1] The following is the lecture I was privileged to deliver at the Las Vegas Kollel in Las Vegas, Nevada, Shabbos Kodesh Parshas Bo 5778. I enjoyed a beautiful Shabbos there with our daughter Aviva, hosted by our friend Menachem Moskovitz and family.
I began my remarks by noting that the one thing which is not a gamble in Las Vegas, is the warmth of the community.
[2] This is a true account which I personally fabricated
[3] Which is quite incredible considering that Maslow wouldn’t be born for over three millennia
[4] Shemos 5:9
[5] The first time I went shopping before Shabbos shortly after I got married (along with all the other men shopping with a cell phone in hand trying to figure out what their wives wanted them to get…) my wife told me to get parsnip, and instructed me that it looks like a big white carrot. So I brought home a horseradish...

[6] Physically on line in a store check-out aisle, not the internet
[7] Tehillim 118:5

Thursday, January 3, 2019



Tsachi Sasson served in the Israel Defense Force’s armored corps. He loved others and was always looking to help others.
After his years of service, he married and had two children. On Sunday evening, February 11, 2001, Tsachi was driving from work in Yerushalayim to his home in Gush Etzion. As he was driving through the tunnels leaving the city, he was murdered by Arab terrorists. 
After his death, his family publicized a letter that Tsachi had written to his younger brother Gabi, upon Gabi’s inscription to the army in 1989. The letter is entitled "להיות חייל דתי" – to be a religious solider.
In that letter Tsachi wrote[2]: “To daven shachris after a white night[3], to daven ma’ariv after traveling, when there are a few minutes to learn mishnayos even though you are so tired… at times to forgo on the supper you are so hungry for in order to maintain the laws of not eating dairy after meat, to always know when the deadline is for tefilah, because the commander often forgets to tell you… to be careful to never use foul language, because the kippah upon your heard demands that you always speak pleasantly… to never allow anyone to change you, to always be proud to be a religious Zionist…”
Tsachi concluded by requesting that Gabi reread the letter each week to remind him of his priorities and values.  
I have a professional copy of the letter that I keep in my wallet. It reminds me that we are all soldiers with a mission. We are part of an elite people with an elite mission – to sanctify the name of G-d and to be a moral compass for the world.

Mesillas Yesharim[4] notes that every aspect of life contains struggles and tests: “And if he will be a soldier and he will be victorious in all aspects, he will become the complete person who will merit clinging to his Creator, and he will emerge from this anteroom to enter the great banquet hall where he will bask in the light of eternal life. Commensurate to how much he conquered his evil inclination and his desires, and how much he distanced himself from those things which detract him from the ultimate good, will he achieve it and rejoice in it.”
Every Jewish parent wishes for their child that he be a proud solider in the army of G-d, who fulfills his mission with pride and confidence. 

There are two components of this quest of being a loyal soldier that emerge from parshas Va’era.
During the reign of the wicked king Nebuchadnezzar, Nebuchadnezzar had an image erected with his likeness and insisted that everyone bow before it. Chanaya, Mishael, and Azaryah chose to defy the command, although they knew that doing so would likely cost them their lives. They were cast into a fiery furnace, and only miraculously did they emerge unscathed.
The gemara[5] asks how they knew to do so? The gemara quotes ‘Todos the Roman’ who explained that they learned that lesson from the frogs during the second plague in Egypt. They reasoned that if the frogs had no obligation to sanctify the Name of G-d, and yet were willing to jump into the ovens to fulfill the Will of G-d in plaguing the Egyptians, then they, who were obligated to sanctify the Name of G-d, should surely be prepared to be thrown into a fire to sanctify His Name.
The prophet Yecheskel had advised Chanaya, Mishael, and Azaryah to hide so they wouldn’t be obligated to bow to the statue of Nebuchadnezzar.[6] They, however, were concerned that other Jews might think it was permitted to bow to the statue. They therefore, chose to jeopardize their lives in order to be an example for the rest of the nation not to bow.
Rav Shimon Schwab zt’l explained that although the frogs had received a general directive to spread out throughout Egypt to wreak havoc and assault the Egyptians, no individual frog had been commanded to enter an oven. Every frog could have chosen to jump around on the beds and eat the fruits. Nevertheless, there were some frogs that took it upon themselves to jump into the ovens in order to fulfill the Will of G-d in this unique manner. Chanaya, Mishael, and Azaryah took a lesson from the frogs that they too should put their lives on the line to sanctify G-d even though they were not obligated to do so.
One of the most important components of being a soldier is to be ready to follow orders on a whim. A soldier is trained to reply “yes, sir!” and follow the instructions of his commander whether he likes it or understands them or not.
No matter what Hashem demanded of our patriarchs, they were always ready to respond “Hineni – behold, here I am!” Life is full of twists and turns. The only predictable thing in life is its unpredictability. The loyal soldier is one who declares “hineni” in whatever situation and predicament he finds himself in. “Hineni” is the opposite of “why me?”
 Our constant question must be – what does G-d want from me now? It’s not always an easy question to answer, and sometimes we may not know the answer. But the question serves as a guide to direct a person’s thinking.
When Moshe stood before the nation and delivered to them the news of their imminent redemption, they did not - could not - hear it. “They did not listen to Moshe due to kotzer ruach (lit. shortness of breath) and hard work.[7]
What is ‘kotzer ruach’? 

Nick Vujicic was born without any hands or feet. As could be imagined, as a child he struggled mentally, emotionally, and physically. There were many times that he wished he could die. With time however, he not only came to terms with his significant disabilities, he embraced it and became a source of great inspiration.
He became a motivational speaker and travels internationally inspiring millions of people, particularly downtrodden and depressed teens. He founded a nonprofit organization called Life Without Limbs.
Today, Nick is married and has two healthy sons.

Kotzer ruach connotes hopelessness and giving up[8]; one who has grown despondent because of his calamitous predicament. He has grown weary of his unfulfilled sanguinity and despairs of his situation improving. In the process he has forfeited his hopes and dreams, the things he once aspired to achieve and become. Kotzer ruach has far more dire consequences even than the painful physical servitude.
Those who are somehow able to maintain a sense of faith and hope even in the worst conditions have far greater endurance and chances of survival.
One of the most important components for a Jew to live a meaningful life is to feel spiritually connected. Spiritually, in the sense that his very spirit is elevated through his observance of Torah and mitzvos.
Towards the end of shachris we recite, “And I – this is My treaty with them – says G-d: My spirit that is upon you and My words that I have placed in your mouth, they will not be removed from your children and from the mouths of your children’s children, from now until forever.”  This is our greatest hope and blessing for ourselves and for our children – that we/they always feel spiritually connected and elevated to such a degree that it is passed on to our progeny.
Before Klal Yisroel could leave Egypt, they had to regain a recognition of their personal greatness and their ability to ascend beyond their current misery.

We are all soldiers in the most elite army, united by our divine directive. To fulfill our roles, we need to maintain a sense of mission and be prepared for whatever is sent our way. We also must recognize the importance of our individual roles as vital members of the eternal nation.[9]

They did not listen to Moshe due to kotzer ruach
“And if he will be a soldier”

 Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW
Rebbe/Guidance Counselor – Heichal HaTorah
Principal – Ohr Naftoli- New Windsor

[1] The following is the lecture I delivered in Kehillat New Hempstead, Shabbos Kodesh Vaera 5777 upon the occasion of the bar mitzvah of our bechor, Shalom. I had spoken at numerous occasions in KNH throughout my years there, including all stages of the circle of life. For obvious reasons, this was one of the most personally special lectures that I gave during my years there. 
[2] In Hebrew it follows a poetic form. Obviously, it loses that significance in translation. 
[3] i.e. a night of no sleep because of army drills or exercises
[4] Chapter 1
[5] Pesachim 53b
[6] In fact, Daniel heeded the advice of Yecheskel and wasn’t present
[7] Shemos 6:9
[8] Ibn Ezra writes that they were kotzer ruach because of the lengthy exile and the harsh servitude
[9] We daven constantly that our son Shalom, along with all of his siblings, always have that sense of personal mission and feel spiritually connected to Hashem, His Torah, and His people. May he always be willing and ready to say “hineni” to whatever comes his way, and may that ruach Hashem envelop him and manifest in his children and children’s children, from now until forever.