STAM
TORAH
PARSHAS
VAYTZEI 5779
“FOREVER
YOUNG”[1]
One day a
father was walking with his son when they encountered a man who looked like he
was ancient huddled on a park bench. The father saw an opportunity to teach his
son about values. He sat down next to the man and asked him the secret to his
longevity. Through his yellowed teeth he weakly replied that he drank a bottle
of vodka every morning and every night, smoked three packs of cigarettes a day,
and ate donuts and fried foods for breakfast, lunch, and supper. The son was
amazed. “You did all that and you lived to be so old?” The man looked at the
youth and replied, “I’m 28 years old!”
Age is not
necessarily based on chronological years. There are people that are 95 years
young, and other people that are 15 years old. Whether one is old or young has
more to do with their attitude, and ability to be flexible and not rigid and
fixed. One who is young at heart is always seeking to grow and accomplish,
while one who is old feels there is no more room for change or growth.
When Yaakov fled
the wrath of Eisav at the beginning of parshas Vayetzei, he was 63 years old.
One pasuk later, fourteen more years have elapsed, and Yaakov was 77[2].
During the
first seventy-seven years of his life, Yaakov lived – and excelled – in a
certain mode of lifestyle. He was the righteous scholar, unaware and
uninterested in anything beyond his holy books. He lived in the spiritually
serene surroundings of his righteous parents, and was able to advance his
spiritual pursuits with complete devotion.
Yet at this
juncture, he would have to severely alter his mode of living and adapt to a
totally different approach. Not only would he no longer be able to study all
day, he had to become a laborer for a notorious conniving swindler, his
father-in-law Lavan.
Yaakov could
have easily become depressed about his newfound situation. When he had studied
Torah all day in his father’s home, and during the years in the academies of
Shem and Ever, his life was purposeful and meaningful. But working for Lavan
may have felt like a futile endeavor. But Yaakov was undaunted and rose to the
challenge. He embraced his new role and fulfiled it with incredible devotion.
He was honest to a fault, and completely faithful.
Before
arriving in Charan, when he was atop Har HaMoriah, Yaakov declared “Truly
Hashem is in this place, but I did not know.” The pasuk continues, “He became
very afraid and he said, ‘How awesome is this place; this is none other than
the House of Hashem and this is the gateway to heaven’.”
Perhaps
Yaakov was not only referring to the actual sacred ground he was physically
standing on at that moment, but also to his newfound situation and expectations
for the home of Lavan and beyond.
Often
individuals who have spent their formative years learning diligently in yeshiva
surrounded by rabbeim and friends, feel pangs of guilt and discontentment when
the times come for them to leave yeshiva and seek a means of livelihood for
their families. They wonder to themselves what meaning they can find in their
office and in the business world, as compared to their former life in the Bais
Medrash. Can closeness with Hashem be attained in the workplace? Can one
continue to grow in the home of Lavan and when struggling with Eisav?
Yaakov Avinu
declared, “Truly Hashem is in this place, but I did not know.” In
whatever place one finds himself, Hashem is to be found there, if he is sought.
“How awesome is this place” – even beyond the confines of the Bais
Medrash one can grow closer to Hashem in incredible ways if that is his
aspiration and desire.
Yaakov Avinu
remained the same faithful servant of Hashem in the home of Lavan, albeit in a
different manner than he had done for the first seventy-seven years of his
life.
In 1929, Rabbi
Chatzkel Abramsky zt’l was arrested by the NKVD in Soviet Russia and sentenced
to five years of hard labor in Siberia.[3]
Years after
his release, Rabbi Abramsky related to his students: “During my time in Siberia
I woke up in the morning and began reciting ‘Modeh Ani’ – I am thankful before
You – living and enduring King - that You returned to me my soul“, but then I
stopped. My entire body ached from the severe labor I was subjected to daily,
and from the severe blows the sadistic guards dealt us constantly. Was I really
thankful to Hashem for returning my soul to me under such inhumane conditions? I
was unable to learn Torah properly, I wasn’t permitted to serve Hashem, the
constant beatings were intolerable, and there didn’t seem to be any light at
the end of the tunnel. So why was I thankful for waking up?
“But then I
concluded the prayer, “Great is Your faith”. For that alone it was worth
enduring all the torture and suffering of Siberia – for the opportunity to
connect with the infinite through faith. For that I was indeed thankful that
G-d had granted me another day - even in Siberia.”
The Torah
relates that after Leah had given birth to four sons, Rachel become despondent.
“And she said to Yaakov, ‘grant me children, for if not I am dead’.”[4] The
Torah relates that Yaakov became angry with Rachel and replied, “Am I in place
of G-d who has withheld from you fruit of the womb?”
One of the
commentators explain[5] that
Yaakov was upset with Rachel for declaring that if she didn’t have children,
she was dead. It was of course understandable that she desperately desired to
have a child. But if the divine ordained that it was not to be, that her
mission in life was otherwise, was she as good as dead? Could she not have any
other purpose in life? Yaakov felt that the righteous Rachel, despite her pain,
should realize that even when life does not happen the way we hoped or
expected, Hashem has a plan for every person. The mere fact that Hashem has
“returned my soul to me with compassion” demonstrates that Hashem has great
faith in what we can accomplish.
In the
haftorah read on public fast days, the prophet Yeshaya states: “Let the
foreigner who has attached himself to Hashem not say ‘Hashem will separate me
from among His people”, and let the one unable to bear children not say ‘behold
I am a dried out tree’.”[6] The
Navi also declares, “The one who hopes to Hashem will renew his strength, he
will ascend like the wings of eagles, he will run without becoming weary, he
will proceed without tiring.”[7]
A person may
have lived many decades and yet be youthful if he maintains a freshness and
excitement for what life has to offer. One who sees the opportunity in every
juncture of life and in whatever situation he finds himself, maintains a spark
that keeps him young.
When he
arrived in Charan, Yaakov Avinu was seventy-seven. Despite his age, he embraced
the significant transformation of the course of his life and was undaunted by
the challenges that faced him. At that point, Yaakov Avinu wasn’t seventy-seven
years old, but seventy-seven years young![8]
“How awesome
is this place”
“He will run
without becoming weary, they will proceed without tiring
Rabbi Dani Staum,
LMSW
Rebbe/Guidance
Counselor – Heichal HaTorah
Principal – Ohr
Naftoli- New Windsor
[1] The following
is the lecture I delivered in Kehillat New Hempstead, Shabbos Kodesh Vayetzei
5778
[2]
Chazal relate that Yaakov went to learn Torah in the academies of Shem and Ever
for fourteen years to prepare him for the spiritual challenges of being in the
home of Lavan.
[3] Due
to tremendous efforts of prominent Jews throughout the world, he was freed on
Erev Yom Kippur 1931
[4]
Bereishis 30:4
[5] I
regret that I could not locate the source of this very poignant thought
[6]
Yeshaya 56:3
[7]
Yeshaya 40:31
[8] In parshas
Vayigash, when Yaakov finally reunited with Yosef, he is introduced to Pharaoh.
Pharaoh was intrigued by the appearance of Yaakov Avinu and he asked him his
age. Yaakov replied in a manner which – on his exalted level – seemed to decry
the travails he had suffered (Bereishis 47:8-9). For that, he was punished by
losing a year of his life for every word of Pharaoh’s question and of his
reply. In a sense, at that point Yaakov’s reply was that he was one hundred and
thirty years old (See Ramban there). At that point Yaakov became old,
whereas in parshas Vayetzei he was still young, in the sense that we explained
above.
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